You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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