yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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