Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Randomize
