I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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