i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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