He had one of those small greek statue penises
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
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