What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
