good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Randomize
