I think scott just propositioned me for sex
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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