phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Randomize