but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
