chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
