It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
