just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize