Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
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