you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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