im having a threesome with these popsicles
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
