That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
