I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
