people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
