You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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