She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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