I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Randomize
