Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
