benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
