Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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