I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
