I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
