His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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