I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize