Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
