maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize