my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize