Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Come on in and take your pants off
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