i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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