So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
