Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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