Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
