The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
All I want is dick and wine.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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