I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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