I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Randomize
