hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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