i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
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