I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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