There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Your cock deserves a montage
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
