peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Terrible idea I love it
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
