I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
