I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
