KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Randomize
