dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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