So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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