a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Randomize
